Crazy Bus Story Contest

I'm pretty much making this so I can come back and read at all the gross stories to entertain myself in a year.
my original status was: "OK, BITCH ON CROWDED SKYTRAIN WITH NEWSPAPER, your fucking newspaper is in my eye"

and it turned into this thread where people would talk about the weirdest things they've seen on public transit.

CM Lucky it wasn't an umbrella. I once got smacked with an umbrella by a tiny Chinese lady. While walking past me to get on the bus, her umbrella edge came dangerously close to my eyes. So I pushed the umbrella away. I didn't touch her. She wacked me with it and yelled. What gives. No manners.

AS At least she wasn't cutting her toenails. Yes, i,ve seen that

DS Right across from me on the bus once this girl was popping her boyfriend's blackheads and then looking at them with him.

AS I saw shitty panties on the bus once and i don't need to see that shit again. The blackhead thing is pretty gross

CM Wow. Shitty panties? Jesus fuck. I saw a girl vomit into her hands just before getting off a bus once. Gnarly scene, let me tell you. Shitty panties. I wanna puke right now.

LET My mom told me that she saw a guy leave a puddle of diarrhea on a bus seat when he got up. A lady then sat in it, ignoring my mom's warning.

DS wow, I think Liza may have won. A prostitute on Abbott street once tried to sell me her panties. (Of course I bought them for a fair price)

CM You dirty bird. I once had a crack whore grab my balls after asking for a cigarette, which I had given her. Jesus. Talk about wanting to take a bath and lie down. She shook my shit, offering oral sex. gross. I told her to let me go and eventually she did. I was drunk. It was a bit much. I'm over it.

cool right?